DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

> > > > 40-ish.............................................49
> > > > Adventurous................. Slept with everyone
> > > > Athletic...................................... No boobs
> > > > Average looking.................... Ugly
> > > > Beautiful........................... Pathological liar
> > > > Contagious Smile.................. Does a lot of pills
> > > > Emotionally Secure...................... On medication
> > > > Feminist.......................................... Fat
> > > > Free spirit.................................... Junkie
> > > > Friendship first.......................... Former slut
> > > > Fun.......................................... Annoying
> > > > New-Age............ Body hair in the wrong places
> > > > Old-fashioned............................. No BJs
> > > > Open-minded................................. Desperate
> > > > Outgoing...................... Loud and Embarrassing
> > > > Passionate............................... Sloppy drunk
> > > > Professional.................................... Bitch
> > > > Voluptuous................................... Very Fat
> > > > Large frame................................. Hugely Fat
> > > > Wants Soul mate............................... Stalker
> > > >
> > > > WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
> > > > 1. Yes = No
> > > > 2. No = Yes
> > > > 3. Maybe = No
> > > > 4. We need = I want..
> > > > 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
> > > > 6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
> > > > 7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
> > > > 8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
> > > > 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
> > > > 10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
> > > >
> > > > MEN'S ENGLISH:
> > > > 1. I am hungry = I am hungry
> > > > 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
> > > > 3. I am tired = I am tired
> > > > 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
> > > > 5. I love you = Let's have sex now
> > > > 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
> > > > 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
> > > > 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
> > > > 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
> > > > 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
> > > > 11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay